It took me long years to
finally get in front of my computer and compose words and strike them down to
fill a folder in my document files about these jiggling words that had long
been bouncing inside me ready for organized release that may be shared to the
outside. It didn’t took me long enough to come up with a title, “In the Sense
of Existence.” I chose this title in trying to rejoin numerous questions in
mind that until now I haven’t yet found the answers completely. Most are still
big conundrums.
This urge was realized when I began
reading a book Travels of personal
accounts of one of my favourite authors, Michael Crichton. I had been digging
this book in surplus bookstores for almost two years ever since the time I
first read one of his fictions, Congo.
I got interested in who the author was after I noted how that novel was
intelligibly written. Since then I had been scanning for more in booksales of
his listed novels.
Reading his nonfiction novel, Travel, I could not help but appreciate
how he inscribed every detailed research of each of his personal report he
assembled in his tome. I looked at the way he wrote every topic very
interestingly and thought it must have been exceedingly easy for him to write
first hand experiences because the flow of information is very unswerving. But
through the pages, he mentioned that ‘Travel’
is one of which he had a very difficult time writing. He had reservations to
publish it because the anthology of information might be used against him in
the future. My enthusiasm upon reading these words somewhat jumped low and
placed an ‘ahhh...’ in my mouth in agreement. What if it would also be the same
with me? Anyhow, I still regained the lost zeal and continued on forming short
stories in my mind to plot with my plan of writing personal accounts with the
sense of existence on the surface of this earth. But honestly, as I started I also
had a terribly knotty moment recounting those wraithlike episodes in my past
and felt not compelling to include in this work. I felt, I might also get in
trouble in the future.
My first problem however in
trying to write a book story was I didn’t know how to start it. I had no
detailed guide on how to start one and I had not even gone to one seminar or
training on how to write one although, I could still remember my English
subjects in high school and college that taught about the parts of a short
story. We were made to dissect book reviews and identify each component. But of
course that was not enough. I then planned to download huge information on
story writing from the internet and learn it myself which I knew would be
another burden and would use much of my time in learning and trying to
understand all those rationalizations. Another predicament was I had an awfully
limited knowledge on the realities of different cultures in my country, the
Philippines because I had dreadfully limited itinerants even in the small
Philippine island. I had known only some descriptions of some regions and the
people living in it through readings, the television and stories from individuals
from those places whom I had met during some of my out of town movements. What
then and where would I get rich information to yank into my planned book? Another
sticky situation was I am financially too insolvent.
However, I still have to continue this project….
